EditorialsBy Matt Bud, Chairman, The FENG

Some dumb ideas actually work

From our daily member newsletter on October 13, 2020

Back at the beginning of time itself when my good friend Ed Devlin was running what was to become The FENG, he invited me to join. (I don’t know what he was thinking.) Seeing the networking opportunity for my own job search, I immediately offered to act as social chairman for our small gathering of senior financial executives and bring a membership directory to every meeting for distribution. (It wasn’t all that hard as there were only 15-20 of us.) As the meetings I attended became more than a person could count on one hand, I had the occasion to speak with Ed about how to increase our membership. We had both experienced the committee review method and found it [ Read more… ]

Human interaction

From our daily member newsletter on July 26, 2020

Sailors are a naturally friendly lot. (Yes, another sailing analogy!) As one of the other couples my wife and I met at a marina pointed out, it would be considered more than a little strange to go to a motel or hotel and start introducing yourself to other people and ask them if they wanted to join you and your wife for dinner at some restaurant. Yet, sailors do it all the time. When you “blow in” from another harbor you have so many stories to tell and they are harder to share with those who haven’t been through what you have just been through. If it was windy and both of you were hanging on for dear life, you [ Read more… ]

Asking for and accepting help

From our daily member newsletter on December 16, 2019

One of the biggest challenges I face on a daily basis is getting our members to ask for and accept help when they need it. I suppose it is a guy thing and roughly 90% of our members are guys. As everyone knows, guys don’t ask for directions at the gas station. (Have you ever wondered why? Thank goodness for GPS! We don’t have to do that anymore.) Well, I have explored this issue from all sides and the conclusion that I have come to is that the reason most folks shy away from asking for and accepting help is a fear of being unable to pay back the debt they have incurred to the person who provided the assistance. [ Read more… ]

Taking in each other’s laundry

From our daily member newsletter on July 24, 2019

Networking is what The FENG is all about. And, it has a lot of not so obvious twists and turns, one of which I am going to go over tonight. I hope all of you are becoming pros at using our Member Directory Search feature and calling up other members. I hope that those members you are contacting are going out of their way to introduce you to individuals that they know, because it is one of those things that really works. One of the aspects of introducing your friends in The FENG to individuals you know is that it is beneficial to you as well. Your friends want to do favors for you, and actually it is easier for [ Read more… ]

No one has enough friends

From our daily member newsletter on July 21, 2019

For those of you who are new to the networking process or who claim to not be very good at it, please know that even I am still learning. Friends are always in short supply, especially when it comes to managing your career. But, unlike all the consumer goods available just by taking out your credit card or writing out a check, you have to pay for friendship by giving of yourself. It is often a more costly process than most people imagine, but one well worth the expense. All I can do in tonight’s editorial is to share what I believe are a few truths about the process. Let me start with the care and feeding of old friends. [ Read more… ]

The gift of friendship

From our daily member newsletter on May 9, 2019

As all of you know, The FENG is a circle of friends, not a fee for service. In order to join, someone needs to sponsor you. That act of friendship is how everyone gets started. It is one of those dumb things I came up with at the beginning of time itself that I believe has made our network significantly different from every other professional organization. Of course, every week there are folks who want to join who don’t have a sponsor. When this is the case, we help them find one. It is kind of a Godfather thing: unless you are willing to put yourself in the debt of another person, you’re not going to be very successful at [ Read more… ]

I’ll leave the light on for you

From our daily member newsletter on April 16, 2019

I am sometimes surprised how bashful financial types can be. Although Matt’s rule of networking is “any excuse will do,” many members of The FENG do hesitate picking up that phone and asking for help. Our goal in The FENG is to take away their excuses and get them to call us. As Forrest Gump would argue, life is like a box of chocolates. You never know if that person calling you will become a friend for the rest of your life or not, but you always have to be willing to take that chance. In all my years of being in the world of work, I have always returned every phone call. Call me stupid, but I have been [ Read more… ]

Any excuse will do

From our daily member newsletter on January 23, 2019

Since about 90% of our membership is male, I hope no one will be offended if I let you all in on a little secret – most men don’t have a lot of friends. I am not altogether certain why that is, but it really doesn’t matter because making new friends is actually a lot easier than most people think. If you think about all of the folks that you have gotten close to over the years, I am sure you will find some common elements in their characteristics versus yours. Sometimes it is a “birds of a feather flock together” thing and sometimes it is more like “opposites attract.” The point is no one really knows why couples fall [ Read more… ]

Creating an inner circle of friends

From our daily member newsletter on October 8, 2018

It is a sad fact of life that no one ever has enough friends. Men in particular (and our membership is 90% men) seem to have a difficult time making friends. The whole “guy thing” sort of works against us, I suppose. Men are supposed to be strong and never need help from anyone. Remember when we didn’t ask for directions at the gas station, even when we were hopelessly lost? It’s a good thing most of us are technically competent and can work those wonderful GPS units. It is great not being dependent on other people, don’t you think? What I would like to suggest to all of you is that you set a numerical goal for yourself. See [ Read more… ]

Working your contacts

From our daily member newsletter on October 3, 2018

I would be the first one to agree that finding ways to keep in touch with your business contacts during a job search is more art than science. That said the old saw “out of sight, out of mind” applies here. At the end of my two year job search which began in 1991, I had about 1,400 index cards with the names of those I had contacted for one reason or another. I also had these names in a database of some kind as I recall, but nothing as sophisticated as is possible today with contact software management software. The reason I had all of those names on index cards was so I could carry them with me. (Hard [ Read more… ]

The ultimate scam

From our daily member newsletter on September 4, 2018

I was recently reminded of one of my favored approaches to networking that I discovered in the early 90’s. (Sometime in the late-90’s I stopped calling some of the things I was doing “scams” and started calling them “approaches,” which for some reason those in polite society found more acceptable.) Anyway, the problem circles around trying to find reasons to be in touch with the “regular” contacts on your networking list. As you make the rounds during your search, you are frequently in the position of the copywriter for news radio shows who has to keep freshening up the copy just in case you are still tuned in. The “new and improved” resume that you are taking the time to [ Read more… ]

Acts of friendship

From our daily member newsletter on August 19, 2018

As you know, each week I publish a list of our new members and I ask each member of our august body to call at least one person from the list. I sometimes spend close to a full day out of my personal schedule to review new member candidates. I only ask that each of you call one person — a rough time commitment of about 15 minutes. If you do it every other week or every third week, I can live with that too. Although the truth is we don’t have quite as many members calling new members as I would hope, it still happens a lot more than I ever thought it would when I first suggested it [ Read more… ]

An inner circle of friends

From our daily member newsletter on March 12, 2018

If there is any topic I discuss more than any other in phone conversations and in face to face meetings with new members and old members alike, it is the process of creating your very own inner circle of friends. All you have to do is talk to friends of yours who have found jobs to see how high networking ranks as compared to all other forms of job search and to understand how important it is to create this exclusive and perhaps elusive kind of group for yourself. (And if you do have one, it is never big enough, so read on.) The first step is to figure out how to use our Member Directory Search feature. It really [ Read more… ]

Building friendships-a lot of hard work

From our daily member newsletter on December 10, 2017

The definition of networking I use is: Networking is a process by which you can create meaningful business contacts and relationships to further your career and enhance your professional life. On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the most difficult, networking is a 5. Building friendships is a 10. I know that many of you have become better and better at this “networking thing.” The constant “nagging” I do in our evening editorial I hope has had a significant impact on your daily activities. And, I hope you are enjoying the rewards as well. But, being one who NEVER leaves well enough alone, I thought I would share one of the deep dark secrets of effective networking – some [ Read more… ]

Meetings all over the place

From our daily member newsletter on October 31, 2017

As I was scrolling through the newsletter the past few weeks, I couldn’t help but be struck by all of the chapter and special interest group meeting announcements. I just wonder if ALL of you out there in the land of The FENG are taking advantage of these great opportunities to meet really nice people (fellow members of The FENG) and to experience the warmth of the friendships that are part and parcel of being a member of our august body. If you haven’t ever been to a meeting, I could try to make you feel guilty by telling you how hard your area chairs work to put on these events, but I haven’t found guilt to be as motivating [ Read more… ]

Some dumb ideas actually work

From our daily member newsletter on October 5, 2017

Back at the beginning of time itself when my good friend Ed Devlin was running what was to become The FENG, he invited me to join. (I don’t know what he was thinking.) Seeing the networking opportunity for my own job search, I immediately offered to act as social chairman for our small gathering of senior financial executives and bring a membership directory to every meeting for distribution. (It wasn’t all that hard as there were only 15-20 of us.) As the meetings I attended became more than a person could count on one hand, I had the occasion to speak with Ed about how to increase our membership. We had both experienced the committee review method and found it [ Read more… ]

Meeting the RIGHT folks

From our daily member newsletter on August 8, 2017

Being successful at getting meetings with potential decision makers who don’t have a job right now, but who might make one for you after they meet you, is why networking is the most successful approach to finding a job. Frankly, this is how most business is really done at our level. If you have only gotten interviews through ads or recruiters you are probably wondering how do those lucky dudes do it? How do they manage to get in front of the right people and sweet talk them into offering them a job? Keep in mind that you are not a pea in a pod. You are a unique accumulation of talents acquired over a number of years. If you [ Read more… ]

Time stands still

From our daily member newsletter on August 6, 2017

I can never understand why people hesitate in contacting old friends. It has been one of the blessings in my life that over the 20+ years that I have been Chairing this august body, I have been able to reconnect with almost all of the people I worked with since the 1970’s. (Yes, I am that old!) I have even reconnected with some new friends that I have only known 10-20 years. My experience has been that anyone you have ever known is DELIGHTED to hear from you. This goes for old “enemies” as well. While you may have argued at length with some of these idiots (Did I say idiots? I meant uninformed individuals.), the “discussion” was actually about [ Read more… ]

Spring has sprung

From our daily member newsletter on April 25, 2017

In the past week, it is clear that spring is finally here in Connecticut. As you all probably know, I work out of my home office, and I am fortunate that it faces a heavily wooded area. During the winter, I can see my neighbor’s property off in the distance and sort of notice when there is activity. Not so during the summer. Then, I can just see a few feet into the forest. This time of year I have the pleasure of watching the trees come to life. Every day is filled with a measure of surprise when I notice how much has happened since the day before. In addition, the squirrels are out and about chasing one another [ Read more… ]

Rules of engagement

From our daily member newsletter on November 26, 2007

At most meetings of The FENG here in Westport I take a few minutes during the magic show to explain the best approach to contacting other members of our now vast organization. (The magic show is when Norm Weinstock, Doug Fine and I, from memory, come up with the names of those we have met who our new members should meet. Hey, we only have 27,000+ members, so it really isn’t all that difficult!)   The best approach to contacting just about anyone, including other members, is to send a letter of introduction first with a copy of your resume. I know this flies in the face of things you may have learned, but in a few quick paragraphs, let [ Read more… ]

Thanksgiving!

From our daily member newsletter on November 20, 2007

I hope that all members of The FENG are off on Thursday (and hopefully Friday, Saturday and Sunday) and that you are planning to spend time with family and/or friends or both. These times of celebration are important in so many ways.   They are, of course, reminders of times gone by. Some good times. Some bad times. Some in between times.   First and foremost, I hope you use this first long weekend of the fall/winter season to recharge your batteries. Summer is over. The vacations we took are a distant memory. So, think of this as a mini-vacation.   If you are active in your search or thinking of looking, don’t miss the opportunity this holiday represents to [ Read more… ]

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